Tales of Clergy and Heroism

[Haikan]

Tales of Clergy and Heroism (from a Tequan Pianist)


Preface: Background on Boobaaahh (From a mortal’s understanding.)

Boobaaahh (pronounced: Booo-baaaahhh) is a man of short stature. He does not answer to his name if it is abridged (e.g. “Booba, Bobaah, Boobah.) It must be at least two seconds in length with sustained vowels for him – or his friends –to recognize it as his name. He is about three and a half feet in height. His hair is as the swamp, nappy and greenish brown, with a mossy, almost seaweed texture. He typically wears a fisher’s cap with assorted baits, worms and lures on it, and often holds a fishing trident in his hand. He is not a typical man.

Boobaaahh lives in the swamp Southwest of Tequa, the town in which most of these scripts take place. There is more to him than most could imagine, and yet he can be so simple to understand. One day in a bar, he met and befriended a young man named Geoffrey Fairbanks and took him on as his pupil. Geoffrey was an optimistic young lad who was eager to learn whatever Boobaaahh had to offer. His initial lessons were of fishing mostly. A net and a trident were what he was trained with. Once he showed a proficiency, he moved on to learning how to defend himself outside of barfighting, and eventually he learned to manipulate energy and harness the use of magic. Herein lays the curious nature of Boobaaahh.

Geoffrey is under the impression that his magic is merely something that lies dormant in anybody who shows the promise to learn it. This is not so. Boobaaahh is a wondrous individual beyond a mortal it seems, who is the source of Geoffrey’s abilities. His magic is nothing more than his faith that Boobaaahh guides him right, despite his ignorance of Boobaaahh’s status as a supernatural being.

Boobaaahh does not flaunt his abilities or omnipotence, and none seem to know of him at first - other than his own ‘friends’ and Geoffrey, of course. A few more meet him in time, two of which are the young priest Anistis, and a hooligan girl named Aria Lightfoot. That however can be saved for mentioning later.

“Boobaaahh is the greatest man who has ever lived!”
-Geoffrey Fairbanks 







Geoffrey Fairbanks is a pianist in Tequa. He hails from the Fairbanks Estate in the distant north. Here are assorted scripts of a few of his journeys and those of his friend, Anistis.


Movement One:

Greetings and Befriending

Verse One:

The Morning to Start

The first morning of Geoffrey’s transformation into a hero was not a particularly glorious one. He arose with a yawn and his mouth tasted of eight hours past his last ale. As he bathed and rinsed his mouth he contemplated the happenings of the night before. Last night was a Tuesday, working at the Boar’s Head Tavern, playing piano for drunken patrons until the late hours.

The Boar’s Head was a tavern suited for any weary traveler. Thick smoke filled the air, and the smell of whiskey wafted out into the streets most times. Any type of folk could be found here, although the shadier types prefer the Underboard Tavern. The piano was nice and well-tuned, and Geoffrey had a small following of folk who knew his songs and would often sing along. The bar owner’s name was Jerry, and he gave Geoffrey cheap room and board in return of the attraction his music brought.

Sure, it isn’t too difficult to please inebriated ladies and gentlemen, but it isn’t too hard to offend them either. Especially since recently there have been these new folk in town. Foreigners who were from a place far to the East had filled the bars as of late. While most men of this area are clean-shaven and well-groomed, these folk wear long and unkempt beards and reek of days at sea without showering. Last night there was quite the barfight, and it took a good deal of ale to keep Fairbanks focused on his playing. At one point he had to actually get involved and stop two especially rowdy gentlemen from beating each other senseless.

It had been a late night and he was ready for his new day to begin. His place of living was actually the first room to the left on the second floor of the Boar’s Head Tavern. He was prepared to go meet his master Boobaaahh, and he got dressed and combed his hair. Dressed in an olive green long sleeve shirt, wearing brown pants and a brown vest, he called out to his pet, Icthos. Icthos is a frilled ‘christ-lizard,’ and is Geoffrey’s only close friend, aside from Boobaaahh.

“Icthos, are you ready to visit Boobaaahh?” He asked. Hearing the name of the hermit, the lizard’s head perked up immediately and he began to run in circles on his hind legs excitedly. After about ten seconds of this, he scampered up Geoffrey’s leg and onto his shoulder. Geoff didn’t hesitate to give him his morning meal (which happened to be a hand full of worm-bait. For some reason, worm fish bait is Icky’s favorite snack.)

“Well, now you’ve got your food, I should probably get some of my own.” He walked down the stairs, and greeted Jerry, his employer. On his way out he grabbed two slices of bread and a slab of hot beef. He ate as he walked to his rowboat. The contents of his rowboat were nothing more than a net and four oars. He smiled and gripped the oars, and he began to row.

“Let’s visit Boobaaahh.”

Verse Two:

The Priest meets the God

Anistis was a young and enthusiastic priest of Heironius. His morning started like any other: He prayed for nearly an hour, and then bathed and had his morning meal. After he ate he left the solitude of his room to speak to his superior Gayorg about his job for the day.

“Good morning tide, Gayorg.” he said and he bowed his head. Gayorg essentially told him that the garrison was low on funds and needed monetary gain, soon. Anistis gladly took on the job of making money and he headed out the door without a question. Looking for work, he searched the docks for advertisements of needed help.

Down by the docks in the swamp town of Tequa he went. He traveled to an area where there were want ads, and he read a few. One ad spoke of a broken roof that needed fixed, and he jotted down the contact number. He spotted another that said “now hiring” and he jotted down that number and headed to the local phone system, which had four phones on it, one facing each direction, and it was referred to as the “beeper box.”

When he arrived at the beeper box, there was a short old man standing in the way of his phone, and he gestured for the man to go ahead of him.

“No, it’s fine. You go my boy.” The old man said happily, and Anistis nodded and proceeded to punch in the number to the general work ad, and waited for the call to connect. A beefy voice answered his call.

“Hello?”

“Hi, my name is Anistis, I’m calling about work?”

“Yeah, meet us down at the third wharf warehouse at sunset and we’ll see what we can do.” The call was ended as the beefy voice clicked off the call. Anistis jotted down the time of his meeting and then called the roof repair number. The phone across from Anistis at the very same beeper box started ringing, and the old man walked over and picked up the phone. Anistis confusedly began.

“Ummm, hello,” he said. “I’m calling about a roof repair.”

“Oh yes, that would be my roof.”

“Why didn’t you just ask me in person if you’re right here…?” Anistis hung up the phone and walked over to the man. The old man held out his hand to shake and cheerfully answered.

“Let us go fix my roof.”


Verse Three:

A Helping Hand

Geoffrey pulled into Boobaaahh’s neck of the swamp, and a thick rooted tree whose roots rose above the water formed the foundation of his shack. It was a perfect place to tie off the boat. He hopped up onto the tree and approached the porch. What he found shocked him though. A massive tree branch as thick as a small tree itself was crashed through the ceiling of the shack. Icthos evidently did not notice, and was trembling with excitement for his meeting with Boobaaahh. Instead of knocking on the door, Geoffrey loudly exclaimed: “Hail! Boobaaahh!” After which the door clicked and opened. Geoff found Boobaaahh to not be home, and he was discontent with the state of the shack.

The branch had knocked out half the ceiling, and there were leaves, splinters, tiles and chunks of wood all over the floor. He took the initiative to start cleaning up without waiting for Boobaaahh.

“Boobaaahh would be pleased if I cleaned without even being asked to.” He said happily, and he started by taking all of the excess wood and tile and placing it on the porch. After an hour and a half of chopping and cleaning and lugging wood around, he finished. What surrounded him now, just about lacked a ceiling, but was an otherwise tidy house.

“Hail! It’s me!” A playful voice of an old man could be heard outside the door, and it clicked and opened. Icthos leapt from Geoffrey’s shoulder and scampered to greet the arriving owner of the shack.

Verse Four: Training, Commence

“Hello Geoffrey! I see you’ve cleaned up around here. Thanks” Said the old man.

“Anytime, master Boobaaahh! Have you anything to teach me today?”

“Certainly! But first, let me introduce you to a new friend. His name is Anistis. He is a Priest of Heironius.”

“Pleased to meet you, Anistis. My name is Geoffrey Fairbanks. Who is Heironius exactly?” He offers his hand to the priest, and he shakes it firmly. Boobaaahh quickly interjects to explain who Heironius is.

“Well, He’s a pretty good guy.”

Anistis looks a bit shocked at this casual reference to a god, but he merely assumes it is Boobaaahh’s strange way of talking at this point. “The pleasure is all mine. I am Anistis.” Upon hearing him say his name, Geoffrey procures a black book from his belt pouch and writes a few sentences before placing it back again.

“Shall we train then, Boobaaahh?”

The old man nodded his head toward the porch, and went to the back of the shed to fetch two tridents. Geoffrey and he then went out to the porch to train.

“So, what am I going to learn today, Boobaaahh?” The pianist asked.

“Watch, Geoffrey. See what I do when I fish. You must wait patiently. Wait for the fish. Wait for him to come up toward you, and wait some more. You must wait for the perfect opportunity, when it dares you to strike. Once he does… Yah!!” He thrusted the trident into the water lightning fast, and he skewered a rainbow trout, perfectly in the middle of its body. “Just like that.”

“Alright, let me try…” He waited. Patiently, as it took at least fifteen minutes for the fishes to forget what just happened. Once he spotted a pink snapper that he was certain was jeering him, he thrusted his trident. “Aw, rats!” He nicked its tail, but it got away.

“You have to wait for the right opportunity to attack, Geoffrey.”

“Alright, hold on.” Again, he waited. Only about ten minutes passed this time, and he thrust forward once more. This time he caught a smallmouth bass, almost perfectly in the middle. He pulled the trident from the water, and the fish flopped about, until he tossed it in a bucket by the door.

“Now, take what you learned from that, and use it on me.” Boobaaahh turned to face Geoffrey and he donned a defensive position. Geoffrey did not hesitate to position himself for battle as well. Anistis merely watched from the doorway, sufficiently confused. Swing, Clink! Whizz, Clang!

Geoffrey whipped his trident around toward Boobaaahh’s right shoulder, and Boobaaahh with no effort hooked the boy’s trident with the prongs of his own, and flung it to the side, disarming him. “I told you to wait for the right opportunity. Remember what you did with the fish.”

“Uh… Right!” He scrambled over to pick up his trident again and he returned to his fighting stance. About a minute and a half passed, while Geoff waited patiently for the right moment. Boobaaahh twitched and thrust his trident right toward Geoffrey’s torso. Clang! Swish! Thud! Geoffrey caught the thrust by blocking with the pole of his own trident and he twisted the polearm around, knocking Boobaaahh’s to the side. Once his master was disarmed, he whacked him in the hip with the round outer-edge of his weapon. Boobaaahh did not flinch or parry.

“Good job, lesson complete. Now, let us cook up these fish.”

Anistis and Geoffrey proceeded to fix the roof with wooden tiles and newly carved beams until late in the day, when Geoffrey had to leave for work. That work night was long and Mr. Fairbanks received a substantial sum in tips, but it was rather uneventful.

Verse Six:

Meeting the Family

It was morning, and once again Anistis prayed, ate and bathed. He approached his superior. “I have another place to work today.” He told his supervisor. He had forgotten to meet the people at the warehouse last night, but he planned to call them back and work everything out. Gayorg was playing chess, but he was playing it with himself. The other chess pieces were moving on their own.

“Alright, go ahead.” Gayorg replied.

“Well, here’s the money I earned from fixing that man’s roof last night.” Anistis handed Gayorg sixty silver pieces. Gayorg promptly shouted for joy and shooed Anistis out to go earn more.

He returned to the Beeper box, and called the number he’d written down the day before. The phone rang, and the same beefy voice answered. “Just come meet us at the warehouse now.”

He walked down to the third dock, and the warehouse was rather easy to find. He knocked on the warehouse door, and a tall and wide man answered, motioning for Anistis to enter. As soon as he did, the man took the Heironian sword and shield that Anistis wore, and calmly stated. “You must check your weapons at the door.”

Anistis shrugged, and followed the man to a table where he sat down and was interviewed.

“So, my name is Anistis… What exactly is the type of work you are going to have me doing?”

“Well, unfortunately I cannot tell you until you sign this nondisclosure agreement.”

“I apologize, but I can’t do that, I have superiors. I cannot do things in secret from them. You’ll have to tell me what I’m going to be doing.”

“Would they be interested in working too?” As the man asked him this, Anistis pondered what Gayorg would say, and the only thing he could think to respond with was their current occupation.

“Oh, so you are clerics of Heironius?” He asked. “I’m afraid we have all the information we need.” The man shooed Anistis out the door and slammed it shut. Many locks could be heard on the other side, and Anistis hollered back to the door.

“What about my weapons?”

“They is company property now, sorry kid.”
Anistis hurried back to the garrison and he explained what happened to Gayorg his superior, and Regis his co-worker. Gayorg said he’d done business with these folks in the past, and that he was shocked that they would do such a thing. “Perhaps some investigation should be done… I’ll stay here and play chess with this fancy set while you take care of it.”

Verse Seven:

Oh What a Night

Geoffrey was playing that night at a local bar called the Underboard. The Underboard was at sea level, while most buildings were about twelve feet up, on large stilts. This tavern was easily accessed with a boat, and was by far the most popular bar in Tequa.

Anistis walked in and heard a playful ragtime tune being played, and he noticed that Geoffrey was playing the piano and singing, with a clear mug filled with coins atop his upright piano. Over the music, Anistis greeted Geoffrey, and they exchanged pleasantries. It was clear that Geoff was working though, so Anistis just continued to walk along. He pondered how he could get some dinner, and just then two heavily bearded folk waved him over to their table. Anistis was more than happy to join them, since they seemed so cheerful and pleasant.

“You thirsty, kiddo?” One clearly inebriated man asked. Booze trickled down his face and into his beard. His companion was singing along with Geoffrey’s music, only his words were completely unintelligible and he clearly did not know the song that was playing.

“A bit, yes.” The acolyte responded. “I could use something to drink.”

The gruff bearded man slid a huge mug toward the boy and said. “It’s called swampwater, try it.”

“Well, okay… I would also like some food, but I can wait for a server.” He sipped his drink and it tasted quite good. The majority of it was what seemed to be some sort of ale, but around the top of the mug there was a very potent alcoholic-lime coating that had the equivalent of maybe three shots of strong alcohol in it.

“Do you know anything about a business that works in secret and takes people’s belongings?” Anistis asked the man who gave him his swampwater, as he continued to sip at it.

“Nah, I don’t know too much about the way things are around here, I’m from far away, y’see.”

Geoffrey’s tune settled down and he wrapped it up to take a break. Just then one of the bearded men who sat with Anistis approached the piano. “Hey pal, I got this here song stuck in my head y’see, and I wanted to know if you would help me play it!” He sways back and forth attempting to stay upright and he leaned all his weight on the piano to keep from falling. Icthos, who typically just runs in circles atop the piano and bobs his head to the music, scampered inside Geoffrey’s shirt, apparently hiding from this man.

“Well I can try.” He replied. The man started to sing what sounded like an exotic Assyrian ballad. His voice was piercing, but the melody was definite. Geoffrey waited a minute or so, and started to play a harmony underneath his song, and the homophonic result sounded new and exciting to most people in the bar. When it was over a flood of foreign people tipped him, and the man who taught him the ballad nodded his head just before passing out. “Thank’ye, my name is Ishmael…” And he fainted onto the floor, snoring.

Geoffrey was done for the night, and he noticed that Anistis had an empty mug in his hand, and was stumbling toward the door. The boy looked pretty sick, as if he’d never had a drink in his life.

“Anistis! I don’t think you should go home like that, you might get lost.” The priest nodded his head and wobbled over to the counter, where he started to speak, but he put his head in his arms on the counter and started snoring. Lynda, the barowner had him taken to a room. Geoffrey walked over to the bar and laid some coin on the counter. “Here, this should cover his room fee and his drink. I hope you don’t mind, but I’m heading home.”

“Take care, Fairbanks.”

Verse Eight:

Hanging Over

“Good morning, Lynda. I’m just stopping by to check on a friend of mine who stayed here last night.” Geoffrey waved to her as he walked in the door. It was midmorning, and the Underboard tavern was just opening. Only a few patrons were there, enjoying a late breakfast. “Is Anistis still here?”

“Yes he is. He should really be careful not to lose control like that… I seem to remember having two tenants carry him to a room. He’s in the third room on the right, second floor above the board.”

“Thanks.” He grabbed a very large mug of water, and he climbed up the two flights of stairs and knocked on the acolyte’s door. Boom, boom, boom! Anistis felt the explosions in his head as the knocking at his door bombarded his brain. He groaned in agony and shuffled to the door. Slowly he opened it, and he scratched his eyelids as the dazzling flare of the morning sun and the hallway light invaded his retina.

“Take this, Anistis, it’ll make you feel a lot better, I promise.” He handed Anistis the tall glass of water. “If you are feeling better, I can meet you downstairs in half an hour and we can go visit Boobaaahh.”

“…Yeah sure, I’ll be down…” And he sipped his water cautiously and slowly, as too much movement of his head seems to launch his brain into the wall of his skull. “Never again… Ever.”

Geoffrey proceeded to head downstairs, and he passed the time by playing the piano and trying to teach Icthos how to dance. He was unsuccessful with Icky’s dancing, but he drew the attention of a very attractive barmaid. Rebekah was her name, and she winked at him from behind the bar. He returned the wink and continued to play. Her face blushed and she retreated back to the kitchen.

A clean and healthy Anistis walked down the stairs, and he looked completely better. “Never ever again, Geoffrey.”

Movement Two:

Test of Resolve

Verse One:

Mission Statement

“Hail, Boobaaahh!” Geoffrey said, and Icthos again trembled with excitement. The door clicked and swung open and Boobaaahh was waiting inside.

“Welcome back, friends.” He says. “What news?” Anistis spoke up with the news that so troubled him.

“Boobah-“

“Boobaaahh.” Geoffrey interjected.

“Okay, Booobaaaahh, do you know anything about a series of shady operations taking place in Tequa? I ask because I was asked to help a company that worked in a warehouse on the third wharf, and when I mentioned that I was a cleric of Heironius, they shooed me out. They refused to return my sword and shield to me, and I even later found out that that same sword and shield was on display in a local shop for an outrageous price.” As Anistis said all this, Boobaaahh put a finger to his chin and thought for a moment.

“Since you mention it… I have noticed some fishy goings on in the swamp lately. Suspicious folk, dropping bodies off in the waters near here. I wouldn’t be surprised if it were the same people doing that as those that stole your equipment.”

Geoffrey then piped up. “Heironius, I hear he is a good guy.” To which Anistis stared blankly for a minute and confoundedly, he responded.

“He’s… The god that I worship…”

“Oh well. You must understand that I’d only heard of him from Boobaaahh, my apology if I disrespected.” He smiled at the priest and looked around. “Anybody want food?” Anistis then realized how hungry he was, for he had not eaten the night before, or had breakfast. He nodded, and when he looked at Boobaaahh, he noticed the man was already holding two tridents.

“Geoffrey, teach the boy how to fish.”

“You got it!” He said, and he grabbed the tridents and handed one to Anistis. He ran out onto the porch and beckoned Anistis to follow. “Watch closely Anistis… You wait… For the fish to approach, but don’t strike! Wait still, for the fish to mock you, to dare you to catch it.” Just then he lunged forward and pulled two fat trout out of the water on his trident. “Just like that, now you try.”

Anistis held his trident firmly and about fifteen minutes passed. Finally, he thrust his trident into the water, and he caught something. Something with a lot of resistance. Actually the trident was jerked from his hands. The pole arm stood out of the water, perfectly vertical. Shocked, the two of them watched the pole swim away, and they slowly walked back to explain to Boobaaahh what happened.

“Oh, you must have hit Jerry. That wasn’t very nice, now was it? Don’t worry he’ll be fine. Let’s eat. Anistis, what do you like?”

“Well, I like turnips.”

“Turnips, I can do. Come with me.” He knocked on the floor three times and pulled up a circular trap door. He opened it up and there was a ladder that extended nearly a hundred feet down. He started to climb down, and Geoffrey without questioning followed. Anistis however was hesitant and peeked in. What he saw was green fields, forest, a river and acres of farmland below. He was extremely confused, and he seemed to recall a particularly strange comment made by Boobaaahh a few days ago. Oh Heironius? Yeah, he’s a pretty good guy. It led Anistis to think there was much more to Boobaaahh than meets the eye. The head of Geoffrey Fairbanks popped up from the hole, and he asked.

“You coming, Anistis?”

“Oh, right.” And he followed right behind.

Verse Two:

The Land of Boobaaahh’s Will

When Anistis looked up, he was amazed at what he saw. Despite the fact that he was below ground, there was nothing but sky above him. It was partly cloudy and the sun shone overhead. At the top of the ladder there was a hole in the sky, but a flock of birds flew above it through the sky. This is under normal circumstances impossible, but Geoffrey and Boobaaahh did not seem to be shocked at all. When he reached the ground, he noticed that around the ladder there were four spires, one for each cardinal direction. Boobaaahh started to head towards a river, and he led the two along a river until they reached a massive fallen tree that blocked the river. “Trees seem to be my bane lately. Could you two gentlemen kindly remove this for me while I cook up some food?”

“You bet!” Geoffrey exclaimed.

“Sure, could we have some tools?” Anistis asked. As he said that, Boobaaahh started reaching around in a pile of pine needles and he found a handle. He pulled a trap door up and there was a large storage chamber with tools and axes and rakes, etc.

“These should do. If you ever need to find the door, just look around for it and it’ll be there.” Boobaaahh handed Geoffrey and Anistis a double-saw. They agreeably took it to the log and began to cut. “I’ll be over in that direction if anybody needs me. I shall cook up turnips and fish.” Though he did not point in a direction, Geoffrey seemed to know what he meant, so Anistis got to work aligning the saw with the log, about halfway across the river.

In an hour or so, the bark around their sawing spot is gone, but it’s been made clear that this log was too thick and knotted to cut, but Boobaaahh appeared with a large wiggling sack. “You might need to duck.” He then tossed the bag at the log, and several razor-teethed fishes jumped out and started gnawing at the barkless spot on the tree. It only took ten minutes for them to chew through the log, and it snapped in half. When that happened, Geoffrey fell on his backside. Luckily, Anistis immediately helped him up and they ran onto land before they were pulled into the rapids of the newly broken dam.

They had dinner together in a house nearby. When they entered the small shack however they realized that inside it was not a house, it was a massive stone building with high ceilings and long halls. They had fried fish and turnips for dinner and Anistis had never had food so good. Geoffrey was for some reason reminded of Anistis’ theft issue, and he rose a question for the old man. “Boobaaahh, do you have a sword that Anistis could borrow? His was taken, as I’m sure you remember.”


“Well, I don’t have much use for something whose nature is war, but let me see what I can do.”

He got up, and led the two of them down a hallway to an open room with a massive fountain that had an enormous statue of a fish in it. “What have you got for me today, fish? Say could you give me a sword, fish? Oh wait, no no that’s not what-” Out of the mouth of the fish shone a bright light and out popped a huge swordfish, flopping around in the fountain. “I meant: Could you give me a sword, mister fish?” Again the light shone, and this time a sword emerged and clattered onto the ground outside the fountain. “Alright, Geoffrey can you help me put this back?” He pointed to the swordfish and then to a tiny hole about the size of a penny in the side of the fish-statue. Geoffrey without hesitating, aimed the front tooth of the swordfish into the hole, and thrust it in. It seemed to fit just fine, and it returned to the fish rather easily.

“Alright Anistis, you have what you need, correct?”



Verse Three:

The Search

The evening passed somewhat uneventfully. Geoffrey played at the Snout again, and he mixed in some Assyrian tunes with his normal repertoire, and the bearded folk loved it. Of course the regulars were happy to hear the exotic tunes, but the locals were pleased when the familiar old hometown songs that Geoffrey had coined were played. Tips were generous that night, and Geoffrey submitted an outline of a new one handed trident weapon that he wanted to be made to the local blacksmith. The next day was Saturday, on which Geoffrey Fairbanks did not have to work.

Anistis however woke up early and prayed. His superior Gayorg was still playing chess by himself, and evidently he hadn’t left the garrison once since he’d gotten it. When Anistis walked into the room in which Gayorg played, he saw a shadow flee from the area. “What was that, Gayorg? It just left the room.”

“What was what?”

“I saw a shadow flee the room just now.”


“I’m sure it was your imagination. Go ahead and get back to work, I’ll be here playing chess.”

“Well, alright. I’ll probably be back this evening.” Anistis left and went directly to the beeper box. He saw an advertisement for the Boar’s Snout and Geoffrey’s music was one of the attractions for Wednesday and Friday nights. He punched in the number and contacted Geoffrey, requesting him to meet at Boobaaahh’s house again in an hour. He of course agreed, and when he got there, Boobaaahh was nowhere to be seen.

Just then a large stick appeared off in the distance. It was only noticeable because it was pointing out of the water, and it zigzagged toward them and stopped right next to Geoffrey’s boat. The two of them approached the stick and Geoffrey realized something.

“…Jerry?”

The pole wagged back and forth, and Geoffrey asked of it. “Would you like me to get this trident out of you?” The pole rose up and down after he said that. “Alright, hold on.” Geoffrey gripped the trident and gingerly pulled it out. Blood started to come out of the three holes, and Geoffrey held his hand over it, mending the wounds in seconds. Anistis was shocked to see this, and he raised an eyebrow. “Where did you learn to do that?” He asked, confused because that looked like the sort of magic the church would teach.

“Oh, Boobaaahh just showed me how to do a few magic tricks, that’s all.” Once the wounds were healed, he popped out of the water, half of him remaining under the surface. What the two boys saw was a massive fish with six fins and razor sharp teeth. It sucked in air and blew it out for a second, then went back under water for a minute. When it resurfaced it was a gray humanoid with two arms and essentially the same razor sharp teeth. Gills flapped on his neck and he seemed to strain to talk.

“Thanksss for helping me. That trident iss yoursss now.” With that, he went back under the water and swam away.

“Let’s find Boobaaahh, Anistis.” Three times, Geoff knocked on the floor, and then a metal ring appeared. When he opened it up, there appeared a ladder leading down about a hundred feet. The two of them climbed down once more, but this time Anistis was a bit taken by fear of heights. They reached the bottom and as soon as they set foot on the ground, it started to shake. They looked at each-other quizzically, and then ahead they noticed that the ground was fissuring and splitting. The split in the earth widened until it laid right before them, and what they saw was a staircase leading down into darkness. “I suppose we should go down.” He held his trident horizontally in front of him with both hands, and slid his left hand along, up to the three tines, and when he finished the motion, the tines began to glow with light. “Let’s go.” Again Anistis raised an eyebrow to this seemingly divine magic that Geoffrey evidently knew very little about. Regardless, Anistis is trusting, and he follows suit down the stairs.

Ten minutes pass and they finally reach the bottom. What they find is a massive statue of a man, twenty feet tall and with giant marble wings. The statue was next to a table covered in tools and rocks. There were ancient symbols everywhere in the room, and in a tongue that only clerics and spirits could understand, Anistis spoke: “We, friends of Boobaaahh, are in search of his guidance.”

Geoffrey noticed an amazing looking shield with the same pattern on it that Anistis’ sword from the fish had on it. He ran to it and tried it on and started studying it while Anistis spoke in his tongues.

A booming voice replied in the same language: “Boobaaahh is not here, there is only me, Caelith. I do what Boobaaahh wishes for me to do. What do you need?”

“Just advice on how to find him, we haven’t seen him all day.”

“I cannot help you there-“

“Say, can I have this shield?” Geoffrey asked in the common tongue. “It looks really cool and I’d be honored to wield it!”

“It is not mine, and it is not done, Geoffrey.”

“Well, can you show me how you made it?”

“Watch.” Said the voice, and the statue moved his arm. It was now clear that the statue is where the voice came from. He raised his hand in the air, and slammed it into the ground. Except instead of slamming, it melted the ground, and he pulled out a perfect duplicate of the shield. As soon as his hand and the shield left the ground it re-solidified to rock. “Like that.”

Geoffrey raised his hand in the air, and punched the ground. Thunk! “OWWW!” He screamed and clutched his throbbing hand. “That didn’t work at all!”

“I said I’d show you how I made it, not how you could make it… Look, if you want to save Boobaaahh, take these.”

“Wait, did you say save Boobaaahh?” Anistis asked, shocked. He was certain that Boobaaahh was a god at this point, literally not figuratively. “How does Boobaaahh need saved?” But the stone giant did not answer, he just reached into the ground and pulled out two rings. He threw one at Geoffrey and one at Anistis. “You can now manipulate the rock and the earth to an extent. Take these and go.” With that he knelt down and froze again.

Verse Four:

The Capture

The priest and musician reached the top of the stairs at last. Neither understood what the statue had meant by save, but they didn’t have much time to ponder. As they reached the top of the stairs a satyr ran up to them, waving his arms. “Boobaaahh is gone! Boobaaahh is gone!”

“Settle down. Where did he go?” Geoffrey insisted as he tried to calm the raving goat-man

`“He- he was taken! Jerry told me! You’ve got to bring him back!”

Anistis and Geoffrey looked at each other with courage that had no justification. Anistis decided to ask for details. “Where was he taken, and by whom?”

“Jerry saw it all! Boobaaahh was watching bodies being dropped off by bad men in the swamp, and he was captured! They took him to the third wharf warehouse!”

“How could they capture Boobaaahh? Wouldn’t he just escape or fight them?” Asked Anistis, but Geoffrey responded.

“No, Boobaaahh is not violent at all… He wouldn’t have put up a fight. We have to go put up a fight for him!” He punched his fist with righteous fury. “Thank you for the information, what is your name?”

“My name…? Well… What is my name? Boobaaahh always knew who I was. And that was enough. I guess… I guess I don’t have a name.”

“We’ll call you Philip” said Geoffrey. “Now you take care of yourself, we’re going to bring Boobaaahh back. You can count on it.

Verse Five:

The Enchantment of the Family

The boat rolled into Tequa with Anistis and Geoffrey rowing diligently. They arrived and docked, and Geoffrey scratched his head. “Where should we start? We need a plan.”

“My fellow clerics at the garrison will help, let’s go there first” Anistis said. Geoffrey nodded in agreement and followed the young acolyte to his home. Anistis opened the door and walked inside. This time both Geoff and Anistis saw the shadow flee from the chessboard. Gayorg was still at it, staring intently at the now unmoving pieces. Geoffrey decided to stay outside and play fetch with Icthos while he waited for Nisty to deal with his friends. “Okay now there is definitely something wrong here. Gayorg, what is the deal with that chess set?”

“Who are you? Get out of my garrison! You dare disrespect a senior officer?”

“No, I merely wanted to ask for your help.”

“I don’t even know who you are! I can see by your collar that I outrank you, so you’d best be leaving immediately!”

“That’s it. I’m certain this chessboard is evil, just let me-”

“BACK OFF!!!” The superior cleric hissed, and his eyes were filled with hatred. Anistis then just walked to the back of the garrison to look at where the shadow went. He didn’t find anything amiss in his room, and when he walked back out, Gayorg greeted him happily.

“Oh, hello Anistis. Back so soon? Here play chess with me.” The captain scooted the chess set towards Anistis and the boy seemed quite confused.

“Wait. You know my name?” Anistis asked.

“Of course I know your name, you’ve been working here for weeks!”

“Well then can you help us out with something?” He stepped closer and Gayorg once again raised his voice, sounding crazed and angry.

“Who are you?? Stay away from my chess set!!” His eyes bugged out of his sockets and spittle spewed everywhere. His face was a deep red and sweat coated his cheeks and forehead.

“That’s it! I’m not going to let that enchantment take over your soul!” Anistis kicked the chessboard across the room and the pieces remained perfectly in place, despite its ricocheting off the wall and landing upside down.

“Enchantment? You dare accuse a higher up of succumbing to the will of someone else’s spell?”

Anistis did not have time to deal with this argument. He grabbed Gayorg by the arms and pulled him out of the building. The captain kicked and screamed, and once they were both outside, Geoffrey stood in the way of the door, so Gayorg couldn’t get back in. Gayorg looked as if he was in tremendous pain and he screamed, but after a few minutes, his heart rate returned to normal. “Get rid of that chess set immediately. Take it to the nearest temple to be destroyed.” Geoffrey nodded his head, and he went inside and picked it up, placing it in a leather bag.

“Got it.”

Verse Six:

Recruiting assistance

“Excuse me, noble knights. I need your help.” Geoffrey held the evil bag out in front of him, and it immediately caught the attention of both guards of the temple doors. One of them rushed to grab it.

“Where did you get this!?” The first guard asked as he snatched the bag from Geoffrey’s hands.

“Please don’t ask questions, I don’t have time. Just destroy it and hear us out.” He went on to explain all he knew about what he suspected to be a massive crime syndicate in the town. He mentioned that they have been seen discarding bodies, they’ve been stealing from priests, they sold an evil chess set, and they captured master Boobaaahh. One of the knights then turned to the other. “Boobaaahh?”

The other knight replied. “Boobah.” Geoffrey corrected him: “No, it’s Boobaaahh.”

“Who, baaahh?” Asked one knight, but the other answered: “You, baaahh!”

“No, listen please. His name is Boobaaahh, and he is about three feet tall. He is-“

“Wait, he is a little person? Why should we help a little person?” The knight on the left asked this with a shocked look on his face.

The other knight nodded in agreement. “If he is only a little person, he’s probably stupid and doesn’t deserve to be rescued. Little people are fools, he asked for whatever he got.”


“You take that back now!! Boobaaahh is the greatest man who ever lived! And we need your help to save him!” Geoffrey yelled indignantly.

“Alright, alright. This ‘family’ has been a pain in our backsides for a long time. If they’ve been doing all these evil acts, it’s our duty to stop them. By the way, my name is Frederic, and this is George. Meet us by the third wharf at low tide. I heard there is an entrance to the warehouse, only usable at low tide, which is tonight at nine thirty.”

Verse Seven:

Entering enemy territory

The night was warm but dark. The clouds were receding and the stars shone brightly. Two paladin knights, a clerical captain, a pianist and a priest approached the third wharf. The tide was low, and there was in fact a cavern that was visibly only available with low water level. They entered the cave and reached a hallway with just one door on the left. Geoffrey rattled the doorknob, but it was locked.

“What do we do now? Is there anyone here who is capable of opening a lock?” Geoffrey asked, and without skipping a beat, George stood up and pulled his mace from his belt clip. He raised his hands in the air and brought the mace down on one of the hinges to the door. Crack! Unfortunately, it did not break.

“Wait, let me try it.” Geoffrey grabbed the mace, and he swung down with all of his might. Crunch! The hinge shattered, and he lifted his arm for the lower hinge. Crash! The second one was knocked off as well. The door fell inwards and the crew emptied out of the boat and into the building. Frederic tied the boat by the door, and Geoffrey lifted the door back up and stuffed it in the frame, so that the missing door would not draw attention to the situation.

“Let’s go save Boobaaahh!” Geoffrey and Anistis ran down the newly opened hallway, and Geoffrey illuminated his trident once more as they opened doors, blindly running through. Eventually caution was proposed by Gayorg, and they began to quietly explore the warehouse until they stumbled upon a room with prison cells to the left and torture devices all about. In the first two cells there were horribly scarred and injured men, with blood-soaked bandages that seemed to preserve their lives for the sake of torture. Geoffrey and Anistis were both horrified, and they both felt that they had to help these two. Geoffrey just wished to ask a couple questions first, to assure that they did not release serial killers.

“Excuse me, sir what are you doing in that cell?” Geoffrey asked the first one.

“My name is Plotinus… And these people don’t like it when you discover misdeeds in their name…” His head then hung limp and it was apparent that they were both now unconscious. Anistis and Geoffrey agreed that they must be rescued. Icthos spotted the keys, and Geoffrey used them to unlock the prisoners and set them on the ground for treatment. Geoffrey requested the paladin knights to treat their wounds and he used a bit of his own magic to close open sores and return the color to their faces. “Well, still we’ve got to save Boobaaahh. George, Frederic, look after these two while Anistis and I go ahead.”

Anistis proceeded up a flight of stairs that Gayorg found, and Geoffrey followed close behind. The stairs had no handrail, and one could jump from the top landing back down to the prison room. At the top of the stairs was the top landing and a door. Anistis opened it, and a bolt of light shot out at him, knocking him back a few steps and singeing his hair. At that same moment Geoffrey felt a bolt strike him in the shoulder and one from behind in the prison room. A black cloud appeared around their heads, and both of them quickly ran down the stairs to regain their vision. Once at the bottom, Geoffrey saw a robed man with a ball of light sparking in his hand. The man threw that ball at Anistis and it scorched his armor. Geoffrey then swung his trident around to whack the man in the side of the head, but missed. Anistis turned back to the stairs and saw a warrior of some sort ambling down with a sword in hand. The fighter swung his sword down as hard as he apparently could, but Anistis blocked it with his shield and pushed back.

“Anistis, hold on! I’ve got your back!” Geoffrey turned his back to the magician and ran towards the staircase skirmish. The guardian’s arm was pulled back, ready to strike Anistis again. There’s the opportunity. With one hand he lunged his trident past Anistis and in the prongs he caught the warrior’s sword. Grasping the handle of his trident with both hands, he twisted the sword out of the warriors hands and it flew down the stairs and landed in a prison cell.

Anistis proceeded to bash the man with his shield. The fighter clumsily fell backwards up the stairs and clambered into the room from which he came. Geoffrey got a blast of light to his back from the magician, and he turned to face him again. He put his trident in his left hand and he ran in huge strides back to the magician, drawing back his fist. “That’s enough out of you!” Crunch! He slugged the wizard squarely in the nose, and with a spray of blood he fell backwards and didn’t move.

The warrior then reappeared holding a heavy mace in hand. With twice the gusto he had before, he brought the mace down toward Anistis’ head. Unfortunately for the warrior Anistis just blocked again with his shield, and the mace got stuck in his shield. Anistis then pulled his shield back hard enough to disarm the warrior again. With that he kicked the warrior’s leg and he toppled over the landing down to the first floor, and landed on his chest. He too was apparently unconscious. George and Frederic dragged the two fallen enemies into the prison cells and locked them up.

“Now we can save Boobaaahh. As I said before, George and Frederic, stay with these two, and Gayorg keep watch.” Geoffrey and Anistis walked up the stairs, and before they walked through the door, they punched each-others fists excitedly. As they crept through the door, they saw Boobaaahh behind another set of bars. Right in front of his cell though was a massive heavy-plated guard who wielded a huge great-axe. They watched for a moment, and the guard opened Boobaaahh’s cage. He picked Boobaaahh up and started beating him mercilessly, and Boobaaahh did nothing to stop him. At that moment Geoffrey emerged from the shadows and yelled as loud as he could. “Stand down immediately!” Anistis ran up alongside him and they were ready for battle. The guard dropped his prisoner and charged toward Geoffrey and Anistis. Geoff tried to disarm the guard in a similar fashion as before, but he ended up losing his trident in the process, as the guard grabbed the handle and pulled it from his hand. Geoffrey tumbled to the side to grab it, and Anistis swung his sword at the guard as hard as he could. The guard blocked Anistis’ strike, and returned the favor with a giant slash from his axe. And time seemed to stop.

Anistis fell to the floor slowly enough that it could have been sunrise by the time he lay flat.

“Anistis!” Geoffrey screamed so harshly that he could almost feel his larynx tearing apart. Suddenly, there was nothing in the room except the guardian and Anistis. To Geoffrey, it appeared his friend had been killed. Wait for your opponent to dare you to strike… With a blood curdling war cry, he picked up his trident and lunged at the guard. With all his strength he thrust, but the guardian blocked it with the head of his axe. Clang! They exchanged blows and their weapons clanged off of each-other several times before the guardian returned fire with a sideways slash. Geoffrey ducked under it and thrust once more. He missed, but the guardian seemed to fall backwards for some reason. Geoffrey then noticed there was a whip around the man’s neck. Someone has come to help… Then I’ve got to look after Anistis! He turned to Anistis and tried to use his healing magic, but he was punched in the back of the head by the guard.

That was it. Red was all he could see. His friend was dying and if he was going to save him, this man first had to die. He turned around to face the guard and screamed bloody murder as he pulled back his trident and ran it through the guardian’s neck. Blood sprayed and gurgling could be heard from the man who was now on his knees.

“Anistis!” Geoffrey cried for his dead friend. And he did cry, he stood there, watching his opponent fall to the ground. I’ve… I’ve killed a man… And Anistis is… He dropped the trident whose red-smeared face could never express the blood that now stained his soul. As he stood there, staring at nothing, unable to move from the gravity of the situation, Boobaaahh stepped forward. The guardian disappeared in a cloud of shadow, and Anistis groggily sat up, scratching his head. Then Boobaaahh spoke.

“You now know, what it means to be driven to kill someone, Geoffrey.”

To be continued.