The thing about dreams..(open for now...) Sam 27th GT

[Guest]

She could still remember how all had been pretty. And easy. She shouldn't forget to mention easy. When all is handed to you on a silver platter you could say things were easy. But it was a vague memory. A dream perhaps. It didn't seem important. She also thought there had been far to many strange faces. Yes. Definitely not important enough.

Right now things weren't pretty. Haylin tried to move forward through a cold hallway. Or so it seemed. She could not see a thing. It was far to dark to see but it sounded like a hallway. Hollow and empty. Almost like a cave. She stumbled and reached out for the nearest wall, yerking her hand back almost immediately when she felt cold, rough stone beneath her fingers, wet with something slimy. Then it was a cave perhaps? She just wanted out of it and back into the light. She didn't like not being able to see. It was making her feel claustrophobic and the feeling got worse every burn she spend in the dark.

The girl rubbed her hand clean on the tunic she wore and reached up to her neck. Her fingers found a tight collar, like the one you sometimes see on cats, only this one had no bell on it and felt like it was made out of iron. It didn't make much sense so she decided to ignore it for now. She merely stumbled on.

If she would have dared to do so she might have cried out for help. She didn't. Didn't dare and wouldn't do it. Fear had a lot to do with it but being stubborn even more. She didn't want any help. She could do things herself. And if she couldn't do something she would learn. Like reading. She could do that herself. Definitely. Perhaps not now but she would some day.

The moment she thought that very thing she saw light. Far away but it was there. Light in the distance. See. She didn't need any help. With new found spirit the girl picked up her pace a bit, going for the light. It was closer than she had thought it would be and before she knew it she was standing in a cavernous hall. She looked up but all she saw above her was more black. The ceiling, if there was any, wasn't visible from here. The other side of the hall wasn't visible either. More black. Just like the space between the many pillars on her left and right. The hall was softly illuminated, but from where she couldn't tell. That was the thing about dreams... You never quite knew what was going on.

[Guest]

The girl tried to figure out where she was by walking around aimlessly, but every time she walked towards any of the four dark column walls it seemed like they moved away from her, leaving her standing in the center of the room again. She had to admit it was scaring her a little, though she would never say that out loud.

What was making it worse was that it was so very quiet. She would have given anything for a little noise, or an other person. The vast quietness and being stuck in the center of the hall made her slightly claustrophobic again, though not as badly as the dark had done before. With a sigh of frustration the girl sat down on the marble floor, polished to a brilliant shine in which she could see her own reflection. Even that didn't give her any comfort though.

She felt small, alone and stuck. Haylin felt like she had to defend herself, but it would have been nicer to know why or what for she was defending herself. She was defending herself most of the time but it suddenly seemed like all she ever did was building walls. Shutting people out. Even against that tiny bit of light there was present she felt like she had to defend herself. Why couldn't she just let it go? Brann had been the first one to whom she had admit she couldn't do something. She had actually told him about her own insecurities concerning her looks. Did he even realise that?

The light in the hall became a little brighter and Haylin was able to look up a little further but still she couldn't see the end of it. It had helped a bit. The small addition of light. But the pillars now cast long shadows from all directions, seeming unfriendly to her eyes. Was she in trouble?

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

A lone figure started to move forward, there was no sound that emanated from her but the source of light was her. Her hair was the color of spun silver moonlight and her outfit was a soft pristine robe with silver threads spun through the cloth. She held a lantern in her hand as she looked about with sadness that only she let out when she believed she was alone.

Haylin would be able to see the woman as she drew closer and she looked as if she was in mourning as she shuffled through. Perhaps it was how her mind might conceive it or something more but it did seem like she was floating or her feet were bare. Although a twinkle of what looked like metal anklets that would bound her ankles but without the chain to still enable mobility.

Then the woman saw Haylin and she frowned slightly. She noted the metal collar around her neck and frowned at it as she looked upon the girl once again. "What are you doing here?" She asked as her head tilted to one side, her voice soft like a caressing whisper. The question was not harsh but out of curiosity and concern as if Haylin was not supposed to be here and the silver-haired woman just happened upon her.

[Guest]

Was the light actually getting closer? Haylin blinked a few times, unable to see what was with the light, blinded by looking into it. Was she in real trouble now? Or was there actually an other person here like she had wished for? Haylin didn't think that whatever it was noticed her at first, as it kept moving. Whatever it was, it was probably blinded by its own light, a bright beacon in the darkness.

When it did stop the girl couldn't help but wonder why this person was here. Not that she didn't like the company. On the contrary. She just seemed...out of place.

A small sparkle caught her eye and when Haylin noticed the metal anklets she couldn't help but touch her own collar. She felt like something was starting to make sense, like she should understand something a little better but it was hard to figure out. She just wanted to be happy about the company even though the woman didn't seem very happy.

"I don't really know..." Haylin answered truthfully, seemingly at ease around this strange person with the comforting voice. "Do you know where we are? Or why I'm here? I can't seem to get out of this hall..." It sounded pathetic to her own ears but Haylin tried to ignore it. Her fingers brushed the collar again and she glanced at the womans feet. Was she perhaps bound to something like Haylin was bound to her own insecurities?

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

Alexandrya knelt down and placed the lantern carefully on the ground. She gave Haylin a sincere smile as bright as the lantern shone and nodded at Haylin's reply as if she knew exactly why the girl was here. "My name is Alazandra, what is yours?" She asked as she knelt beside the girl.

All signs of the sadness was gone as if she was also relieved that she was not alone even if it would be a short while. "I have not quite given this place a name but it is what I would call a dream but also a place where I come when I feel trapped of the life I lead." It was her own explanation of this place. She looked at Haylin carefully as if studying her, reading her emotions but nothing was conveyed if she could or not. "I think the reason is different for everyone." She scooted her legs around to reveal her own sign of captivity and then at the girl's own collar. "I believe I wander around here because sometimes I have no where else to go to hide from the world. The one thing I cannot have because it will change me...perhaps for the worse. I realise that it will be a constant conflict and I will not stop but it is something I must do."

She pulled her legs towards her chest. "What of you? That collar around your own neck might indicate that something keeps a hold over you as well. I would not know the answers on how to truly free you. As for how to leave, it is also something you would need to figure out for yourself. I think for every individual it could be slightly different. It might just be something that you have to decide upon yourself instead of trying to physically propelling yourself in this Aether world."

[Guest]

The light was bright enough that a shadow that fell across it was sharp. The shadow was sharp enough that, as the two women conversed, it became unmistakeable.

Dressed in average clothes, the shadow proved to belong not to a woman, or a man, but rather to an Adhiel, and a male Dark Adhiel at that. The dark skinned inhabitant of the underground world held a hand up to his eyes at the dazzling sight of the lantern. As he did so, metal bands could be seen on his wrists, and, just like the two of them, a collar about his neck.

"Greetings" the Adhiel said tentatively to the two women. "I...I appear to have gotten lost, somehow."

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

Alazandra stiffened her back as she heard another voice call out in greeting. She looked at the dark Adhiel with curiosity. "Hello," her voice was soft and could have been mistaken as shyness, but she seemed proud even as she sat there with the other girl.

The bright blue-gray eyes noticed the same chains that binded the Adhiel and felt a kinship of sorts. "Lost...here? I have not quite figured this place out. So far it makes me feel like it's some sort of purgatory but binds me to my emotional and physical baggage."

She noticed that the stranger seemed sensitive to the light and lowered the shutters on the lantern a bit more. "I am Alazandra, what might your name be, sir?"

[Guest]

Mordular blinked, but a look of gratitude crossed his face as the girl dimmed the lantern enough so that he was not blinded by its dazzling light. He remained standing though, as he reached where the two girls were sitting.

"My name." The Dark "Adhiel seemed puzzled himself by this question. "Mor...Mordular, yes, that's it. Mordular." Mordular seemed a bit unsure of the answer, though. "I've been wandering in these caverns for some time, but they look like nothing like the ones I recognize from home."

He regarded the other, as yet quiet, woman but then returned to regard Alazandra. "Purgatory?" he asked quizzically.

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

"Mordular?" She murmured more to herself and caught the hesitation that the dark adhiel gave when he gave the name. She would question that later. "A place that you come to suffer, feel regrets and hopefully become free when you can pass the obstacles or rather chains that bind you."

Her eyes looked at the collar and the shackles and those bright blue-grey eyes gazed into Mordular. "Where is home to you and why do you believe you are here?"

She could not quite explain that this place seemed to force people to look inside of themselves. The shackles and collar is what holds people back. It was of cours her interpretation but it may be different for everyone, or not.

"Do you know of anything in your body, soul or mind that holds you back?" She asked curiously.

[Guest]

Mordular once again glanced at the woman who had not yet spoken, before returning his gaze upon Alazandra.

"I live in Gulanadur, of course." Mordular said, in a matter of fact tone. "The realm of her majesty Queen Ser'raquine".

"As for your other question, is that the meaning of these bonds?" Mordular asked, holding up his arms again. "Things holding me back, my doubts, my fears, made manifest by some sort of sorcery?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

The silver-haired beauty nodded at the mention of Gulanadur. She did not know much of the place, but he felt it was important. When he countered her question with a question of his own, she smiled sadly, "Yes. It seems to be that." She did shake her head negatively, "I am not exactly sure of the sorcery part, but at times, this reasoning makes sense." She murmured in answer.

Alazandra studied Mordular, "I have never seen any of your race before." She murmured softly. "Your hair is similiar to my own in color but your skin is darker than any I have seen." She blushed, "I am sorry for my ignorance. I guess you can say that I had lead a sheltered life up until this point." She smiled at him, no prejudice, no fear, or no false emotions, "So what do you do Modular?"

She knew Haylin to be shy and perhaps taking this time to get the courage to say something. She could be wrong, but when she was ready to interject she might do it when she is most comfortable with them.

[Guest]

"You're an Adhiel?" Mordular asked, his eyes studying Alazandra a little more boldly than he had to present. Finally, he found himself looking away rather than lingering the gaze.

"Ignorance is correctable, whereas dullness and stupidity are not." Mordular said, as if quoting someone or something. A trace of emotion flickered across his face.

"To answer your question, and plainly." he continued, keeping his eyes in the general vicinity of the beautiful half-elf. "I am a member of one of the Merchant Houses." he began. "My ambition is to eventually become a Dark Knight." he continued. "My ambition and my path, however, have proven more difficult than I imagined." Mordular admitted.

He looked down and studied his feet, or more precisely, studied the ground where he stood, as if seeking some sort of knowledge in the unnatural floor of the cavern. "Much to my shame and regret, despite what others have said to console me on the matter."

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

She smiled, "From my father's side." She watched as he boldly took in her appearance and then looked away as if he may have been shy. Her eyes twinkled as Mordular spoke of ignorance, dullness and stupidity but she had glimpsed of an emotion that she did not quite read and before she could discern what it was, it was gone. She felt that she should not probe into his thoughts, instead she listened to the answer of the question she asked.

Alazandra continued to study Mordular's face and body language. She pat the floor next to her, "Please, have a seat. Make yourself comfortable, even though it does seem like a rather dank floor." The smile was inviting and her interest was evident. "It sounds like an exciting and ambitious position, but what do you find is causing difficulty or rather becoming an obstacle to prevent you from achieving your goal?"

She knew that it was not her business to pry and of course he would not have to answer if he did not wish to. This place caused her to become curious to why people end up here. This place is everyones' weakness and everyones' strength. She shook her head, "You cannot let shame and regrets be your chains. There is always a solution. It is your life and you must figure out a way to overcome. No one can give you confidence and strength but yourself."

The young achadhiel knew she was being preachy, but she could not help it. She thought of it as reconstruction and empowerment. This place helped. Her words were only of encouragement and her questions to help him explore what truly holds him back.

[Guest]

"Ahhh" Mordular said as Alazandra cleared up the matter of her parentage, and the dark skinned, silver haired dark adhiel found himself nodding.

He took a seat, folding his legs crosswise as he did so, giving a glance to the still silent companion to the Achadhiel upon her invitation to do so.

"What holds me back is self-doubt, with a large portion of failure." Mordular said, his eyes unable to look into the luminous ones of Alazandra as he did so, as if looking away in shame. "Because of my inadequacies, there were deaths in Gulanadur a tide ago." he said. "While it has been said and maintained that it is not entirely my fault, my naescent skills were not up to the task to which I was set."

"And while your words are true, they are more easily said, than they are embodied." Mordular said. He looked up at her. "But you, Alazandra. If these are bonds that hold us, in some manner, why do you wear them, too?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

"Self-doubt and failure...perhaps your doubt caused that large portion of failure?" She frowned gently at the mention of death. "So much death these days..." She murmured softly. "There will come a time when you do what you need to do, and with failure, you can find the good points in you, and prevent your doubt from clouding your mind."

She nodded in agreement, "You are right, they are easier said than done." She looked at her own bonds, "It is what I believe holds me back from what I want to do and what I need to do." Bluish gray eyes look at Mordular, "To be in a situation where you promise one thing, and know that when you get the opportunity you will fail but if you fail, you will forfeit your life. If you do not fulfill the promise, you will continue to live in shame and regret." She sighed softly, "I do not know what is worse....to break this promise of vengence or to fail and die because of my failure."

A lovely hand tried to wave away the sadness, "It is what holds me back sometimes from obtaining my future. I guess you can say these bonds are my past..."

[Guest]

"I don't know if my doubt caused the failure. It all happened so suddenly." Mordular said reflectively. "It was like a nightmare unfolding within a very few moments. My inaction did not cost lives, but my inability to meet the foes did."

"The past carries a shadow upon the present and the future." Mordular agreed. "And it does shape not only what we do, but what we can do. And yet." he said, moving a little closer to Alazandra "there are always new choices for today, and the tomorrows to come."

"I suppose that I need to learn myself the lessons I seek to impart to you." he said ruefully.

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

"Inability?" She asked, "I do not understand what you mean, but I guess that happens if I do not know the whole circumstance of the matter."

She nodded about the past but then hesitated about the mention of making new choices. Was she not happy where she currently was? Would it keep her content? All the lies that have begun, she knew she was not really Alazandra Dysia, a concoction of her imagination to keep her safe. She sighed softly, "If only it was that easy. Let the past be the past. I know if I do not let it go, it will destroy me and the people I love. It does scare me, but I cannot back down because of my fears. It is through life that we conquer our fears and we continue to live to fight another day..,or something like that."

She chuckled softly. "Life seems to be so full of tragedy that we need to keep every happy moment in a jar to look back on." She looked at Mordular. "It seems that you still survived your disappointment, do you believe that made you all the more determined to succeed the next time or do you find yourself lacking the courage to try again?"

[Guest]

Mordular listened carefully to Alazandra's words, his eyes flickering back and forth between her and the cavern wall nearby.

"I honestly don't know. It would be a pity for me to give up forever, wouldn't it?" Mordular said, raising his arms and regarding the bonds on them, as if he had worn them forever and had become used to their presence. "It would not becoming to one who would be one of the Sentinels, to say nothing of a Dark Knight. And yet, here I am, as you, and bound."

"Its not as simple as knowing what to do, it seems." Mordular said. "Words are well only if they precede action. In both of our cases."

He cocked his head. "Where are you from, Alazandra?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

A soft sigh escaped her pink lips as she gazed down at her bonds, "Yes it would. You must keep foraging on...it seems that death, destruction...war is never far behind." She murmured with a tinge of sadness.

Her eyes met Mordular's as the smile returned, "My mother's home was the Citadel, and my father...well, I was my mother's daugther." She replied, "I was raised in the Citadel but cloistered away until my mother...passed away." The emotions blocked breath from her throat as she tried to swallow. A soft cough was expelled as she tried to regain her ability to breathe. Her own face was hidden from Mordular to hide any betrayal of emotions. "My apologises, it is still fresh on my mind, Mordular." Why am I telling him all this? I had not told anyone except for Torc...too much information could be my death.

She wrapped her arms around her legs bringing her knees to her chest. "It is always difficult to lose someone." My mother...my father as well? Alazandra sighed once more and then put a watery smile upon her face, "I had moved to the World's Mouth and currently making my living. It is my dream to become a famous actress."

[Guest]

"I've never been to the world above." Mordular admitted, listening intently as Alazandra spun her story. He started to reach out a hand as she huddled into what looked like to Mordular like a cocoon but held the hand in midair, frozen in thought.

Finally, he decided, and reached out his hand to alight on her shoulder. The gesture was surprisingly soft, even softer than Alazandra might expect, perhaps a function of this place, or of some body skill Mordular possessed. His words were equally gentle.

"Are you an actress now?" Mordular asked gently. "Or does your dream require you to become one, first?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

She had drawn inward as she spoke of her grief and did not realise another was still there except for the soft gesture upon her shoulder. Alazandra's teary eyes met Mordular's as she replied. "I am an actress now but just starting off. I have had only one real production but there was someone already interested in sponsoring me."

Alazandra smiled sadly, "My dream requires that I succeed as an actress. My thoughts consume me, but I cannot share what eats at me." Her eyes met Mordular's, "Would you venture to the world above or does your life ever require you to do so?" She asked curiously not quite knowing much about Mordular or his people.

[Guest]

(My apologies for the lateness of this.)

Mordular, from his seated position, gave a jackknife sort of bow at Alazandra's reluctance to share what disturbed her so. "Forgive me for prying too hard, I meant no harm or fault by doing so." His eyes regarded her a moment, seeing if she accepted the apology, before continuing.

"You know that many of my city have come to the World Above, no doubt?" he said. "It is actually that depletion, especially of the Dark Knights, which has set my feet on the path through the caverns of my present and my future." Mordular explained. More than a trace of pride was evident in Mordular's voice as he continued.

"While, one day, I would like to behold the Moon of which the Goddess I serve takes her title, for now, I must and gladly will remain in the city below, to help protect and guard the city from dangers without and within. This I do not only because it is right, but because I wish to do so."

"Still." Mordular continued, his hand still on her shoulder. "what would lie for me on a visit to the World Above I do not know. A Brave New World that has such things in it that I cannot imagine now?"

He paused and then continued. "If your feet have only started on the path to becoming a great actress, then, Alazandra, I can only hope and wish for you to continue on that path, and succeed."

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

A smile graced Alazandra's lips as she heard the pride in Mordular's voices, especially at the mention of protecting what and those that he loves. "What dangers does your city experience?" She asked curiously still knowing nothing of this world that Mordular comes from.

"As for the World Above," she hesitated for a moment as she thought of an honest answer. "It brings sadness, joy, anger...it is not the best place sometimes, but I believe people make it the way it is. There is so much prejudice in this world currently. There is not enough laughter or smiles." She remarked as honestly as she could. "Maybe someday..." She brought her eyes to his, "You will find out for yourself what the World Above will be like. It seems to be different for everyone."

She sighed softly at the mention of being a great actress. "Thank you, Mordular." She murmured softly. "I hope you will be able to defend and protect that which you love." She gave him a reassuring smile. "Who knows, perhaps someday, I shall see you in the World Above."

[Guest]

"Perhaps, one day, we will meet in the World Above." Mordular agreed. "Or, perhaps, in some distant yahren, your own path will take you down to Gulanadur." he countered with a soft smile.

"I cannot tell you all of the dangers that face our city." he continued, growing to a more serious mien. "Even if I knew of them all, I should not lay open the city bare, for someone might glean the information from you, and profit of it."

"I am no Dark Knight, even though I." the pride came back into his voice. "aspire to be one, one day. For now, I wish to become a Sentinel, not quite the same thing. The Dark Knights protect us against dangers from without and within, dangers that I do not even know of. The youth of our Queen, however." Mordular continued. "is also a danger. Youth in a monarch is often an invitation for neighboring forces to seize an opportunity."

"Until such a day as those dangers fade." Mordular finished. "I doubt that my path will take me far from the city I love."

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

The silver-haired achadiel smiled sweetly at the thought. She giggled at the mention of meeting people in Gulandar. "I guess I asked for selfish reasons. I would have no idea why I would even venture to Gulanadur. Of course, if I had a reason to go, I might attempt it."

Her bright eyes gazed upon the dark adhiel. "I do not know how your people would take to me if I did end up at your door steps though." She replied shyly. The smile teasing as she thought about what this far off place would look like.

She nodded as she listened to Mordular about their monarchy. "I think it is difficult enough to learn and live but then to be a queen and to rule a people while growing up. I do not know if I would ever wish that upon anyone." Reassurance shone from her face, "At least, you will be there to protect your queen perhaps...maybe that is your destiny?"