A Time of Healing - Chyril 22nd, GT - CLOSED

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

(ooc: Decided this is much later after Greyhound which she would not remember any of. This I'm not so sure yet...we'll know more as it progresses.)

A young achadhiel opened her eyes to a place she remembered in her past. A lovely place that her mother had passed by with her while they still lived in the Citadel. Curious eyes wandered towards the Temple of Pan, but her life did not permit her at the time to visit this place or any place for that matter so it did come as a surprise as to why she was here...now. She remembered the milky white marble columns with veins of ivy which seemed to look inviting and calming at the time.

Alazandra stood at the entrance of the familiar structure with a smile as she took in the beautiful structure. Slender fingers slid along the beautiful redwood doors as she decided to enter the temple of Pan. She looked down at herself and noticed that she wore a silken outfit of a sapphire blue with silver embroidery on the sleeves of the tunic-like shirt and the loose pants. She also wore silver sandals, and a sturdy grey hooded cloak that hide her body if wrapped properly for protection against nature. Her hair was tied in a high ponytail that she would imagine hurt her scalp, but she made to move to remove the tie.

She closed her eyes for a moment as a sharp pain was felt at her temple which she rubbed away as if a headache had formed and started to throb. Alazandra sighed softly when the pain subsided and decided to explore a bit more.

When she finally entered the temple an acolyte greeted her with open arms. The achadhiel was surprised by the closeness but did not pull away as she was embraced. How may we of Pan's Temple be of service to you? She heard the acolyte ask and the silver-haired achadhiel replied softly. "I am not exactly sure why I am here. I think there is a reason for this journey and it will be revealed in due time as I had learned from previous times but until then, please find me a guide, a priest that I may speak with of this place and of your beliefs.

The young acolyte went off in a direction and Alazandra stayed where she was left to observe all around her and try to remember to visit this beautiful place if it existed.

[Vanir Alfheim]

A young adhiel walked towards Alazandra from the direction the acolyte had disappeared at. He had long brown hair flowing neatly over a pristine white robe. He bore no markings of seniority as most priests do, but it was obvious that he was of some importance by the way he held himself. A soft smile and deep blue eyes complemented his handsome face, appearing more like a noble than a priest. A faint music surrounded Alazandra as he approached, a feeling of calm in each note.

The priest bowed in front of her and offered her a dazzling smile as he spoke. "Greetings, cousin, my name is Vanir Alfheim and I understand you have need of a guide. May I have the pleasure of your name as well or do you wish for your privacy?" He offered his hand to her as the other pointed in the direction of a grand room just beyond. "Follow me into the Altar room and I shall teach you anything you wish to learn."

ooc- I was too tired last night and never returned.

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

Shrewd often prismatic eyes observed the man that approached with caution but he did not make Alexandrya feel uncomfortable or wary as he drew nearer to where she stood. The music that the silver-haired woman heard also might have had something to do to soothe her nervousness.

When he greeted her, she in turn, bowed slightly and gave a small smile, "Greetings Vanir. I am Alazandra." Even in her dreams, she responses with a lie. "I am not entirely sure why I am here." She began as she nodded towards the priest at the request of entering the altar room.

"I have an insatiable curiosity of things that I do not know yet and when I lived...in this city...this was a place I remembered. Perhaps that is why I am here today...to learn of this place and what it stands for." She replied her melodic voice soft and cultured.

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir led her into a large room, lit by several candles along the wall and two candelabra on either side of a large altar. The room is decorated with sweet-smelling rose and silk draperies. The floor is lined by satin pillows and soft cushions, which appeared to be used often. Everything about the room felt natural and captivating, almost surreal to the senses.

The adhiel priest led her before the altar and turned to her. A soft glow in eyes, enhanced by the candles flickering in them, and a warm look upon his face as he stared into her grey eyes. "Tell me about yourself, Alazandra. You have seen this Temple before, but this is your first time inside it, correct? Do you know which Temple this or are you just interested in all of the gods? Tell me about this woman standing before me." Vanir smiled pleasantly, while probing her emotions gently, trying to tell what she was feeling. It would be unlikely that she would even know what he was doing.

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

The silver-haired achadhiel looked about the room. The lighting, the soft, soothing, sensual scent of roses and the music all managed to relax her as she inhaled slowly.

It was a beautiful room both inviting and warm like a scented oil bath.

In front of the altar, Vanir addressed her with his own questions which caused her to look up at him. "Me?" She replied, hesitating slightly. "I believe I have. Yes, I have seen the outside of this Temple when my mother and I used to live in...together. A long time ago. I never had a chance to enter."

Her gaze swept over the altar as she contemplated answering the next question. "I am godless. Faithless. I believe this is a journey to learn more but what I have seen so far is lacking." Her thoughts wandered to the Oneists of the World's Mouth but knew it was not all that believed in the One.

When he probed her, Vanir would feel a sense of melancholy due to a great loss and repressed anger for justice and something else that he could not quite read. Then her feelings were all slammed shut suddenly. Alazandra stared at the Vanir with unblinking eyes but nothing was said about the passive intrusion nor was it acknowledged. Could she have known?

"Escapism, Vanir. Have you ever been in a situation where you could not fix it so you ignore it hoping it would just go away?" Her eyes studied the man's face to catch his own reaction, but he saw that sadness once again but none of the hatred.

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir was not surprised by her sudden closure in her mind. He had not probed her deeply and had not tried to hide his abilities. He had gained enough to see how she was feeling, but not tried hard enough to upset her. The priest reached over and held both her hands softly. A feeling of harmony and compassion flowed off him, yet there was a deeper feeling of loss and pain that he allowed her to see as well.

"Not all who follow a god have faith. Faith does not require belief in a particular god, just faith that you are not alone in this world. Faith is the power that makes us feel that life is worth living. No matter how bad things have gone, there is always something out there worth living for. You just have to find what it is." Vanir allowed her to feel his sadness once more without letting it flood over her. "We have all felt loss at one time or another."

"However as to your other question, that is a bit easier to explain. I come from much different surroundings than this Temple. A family that worshipped only money, not beauty and love like myself. I have seen war, death, love, and hope and felt things that could never be described with mere words. Life is a long path that we must each travel, but there is no map for our path. It is quite common to feel lost on this journey and no shame in asking for help. I have ignored my problems until they grew so large that I could no longer control them, so I ran and ran until my problems caught up to me once more." The handsome adhiel smiled softly and squeezed her hands gently. "Situations are easier to deal with when they present themselves. I know this from my own experiences."

"May I inquire what you hiding from? Perhaps I can be of help?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

The positive energy that Vanir exuded did create some curiosity within Alexandrya. It was still an ability that she was opening up to and working with. It was when Vanir touched her hands and held them that he felt how cold they were despite the warm room. He could also sense how skittish she was at someone's touch and her own struggle to not pull away thinking it was rude because he did not wish her harm.

She had also felt his own pain and loss, a tangible feeling that did help her through her own grief to work through his own. "At the moment, I feel like a lost soul. To find my place in the world is my true goal, if a person needs one to survive. Many a time I wonder why I was spared, why I fight, why I run to survive when I believe I have no reason to live when the ones around me are lost."

He would notice that she shook her head and squared her shoulders as she willed herself to calm down. His next question did not help at all as he saw her inner struggle. Her bright eyes met Vanir's and he saw the same melancholy but now it was intermingled with fear. Terror. "From the ones..." She shook her head and stopped herself abruptly. "I cannot say and you cannot help me with that, Vanir. It is safer if I do not say. Less people know the safer they are." She murmured softly.

"Please..." A plea was made in her soft, mellifluous voice as Alazandra stepped slightly forward towards the priest, he still held her hands, her head slightly averted and her eyes closed as if she was about to pray, "priest, please tell me more of your beliefs..." It was her way of changing the subject. It was not time yet.

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir nodded his head softly, not wanting pry her open until she was ready. He whispered softly to ease her fear of prying ears. "You need not say any more, cousin. I know of those you speak and can assure you that they will be dealt with. They have hurt us all, especially those of so-called pagan faiths. Let us leave such talk for another time though." The handsome adhiel smiled brightly and held her hands tighter, comforting her but still loose enough to pull away if she chose.

"I shall tell you what I can and answer whatever you ask, although even my knowledge will be limited to some things. I suppose the best way to begin is to find out how much you know of Pan. Are you familiar with my god?" Vanir asked her gently, only to find out how much to explain.

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

Alexandrya let him think it was the Oneists she was talking about, worried about but it was still not time to reveal all of her secrets. When the priest changed the subject, she let him.

A gentle shake of her head was given for his question, "I know nothing of your god, Vanir. I do not even know what he represents or why you love him so." She looked about the room and then back at Vanir with a shy whisper, "Is there somewhere we can sit or even walk? I think standing in place might get a bit awkward."

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir leads her over to the pillowed floor and sits down on them. "I assure you that this is probably the most comfortable place in all of the Seven Isles." He waited for Alazandra to get comfortable and begin speaking of his faith.

"Pan is a child of the Mother and Father, like most other gods, yet he is considered to be the more troublesome one by his kin. He is the god of passion, more than anything else, passion in all aspects of life, whether it be love, music, life or anything else you can imagine. Pan believes in beauty, passion, and even a bit of mischief from time to time. There are three main sects of his order, although we all work together to some degree. There is Pan's Joy, Pan's Arts, and Pan's Blood."

"Pan's Joy is study of passion in someone else. I am sure you have heard tales on panlings sharing themselves with multiple partners, often in illicit affairs, cavorting around like heathens. It a reputation that most care to dwell on, but I assure you it is not what it seems. The Joy is the act of sharing yourself with another, bonding two souls and uniting two bodies in an act of passion and love. There is much to Pan's Joy that most do not understand, nor do they wish to, but it is simply finding beauty in another."

Pan's Arts are a little easier to understand. It is finding passion in the fine arts of the world. It does not matter whether you choose your passion in song, dance, painting, storytelling, or even acting. Pan blesses all those who practise such arts and rewards those that spread his works through their craft. The best known follower of Pan's Arts was lady Joya, who for a time served at the court of the kings of the Western Kingdom. It was she who was raised to the status of Pan's Own and took it upon herself to spread the following of Pan in the rest of Tazlure."

"The final sect of Pan is Pan's Blood, which is not as cryptic as it sounds. The true followers of Pan's Blood are chosen by Pan himself, and there role is to protect, rather than initiate conflict. They are chosen for their passion in battle, yet it is a fine line between those taking the path to protect when provoked and those that chose to protect by attacking first. Pan can only guide them on their path, but ultimately the choice is theres."

"Now you understand the very basic principles of Pan. Is there something you wish to know more about or something you are unsure of? I will try not to go to fast in these lessons s it can be overwhelming." Vanir asked softly, smiling affectionately as Alazandra.

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

There was no hesitation this time as she made herself comfortable on the pillowed floor. She had slipped her sandals off and to the side as she brought her legs to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Alexandrya listened carefully to the priest's words of Pan. It certainly sounded beautiful as he spoke of his god. Joy, Art, Blood, the sects of Pan's Order.

"What does this temple lean more heavily towards or do you try to keep all three of these sects balanced? Also, what happened to this Lady Joya that you mentioned?" Her grey eyes studied the man sitting close to her on the pillowed floor as he patiently spoke to her, but his own emotions were not lost to her and it was what she wondered about more.

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir grinned playfully as Alazandra made herself comfortable next to him. She seemed very curious and interested in his teachings, so he continued with some enthusiasm.

"Lady Joya set out the many lands, but one island in particular drew her attention. Pan loved her and the island so much that He affected it forever, making it his own. It was this island that would become Pan's Isle and the home of so many panlings. Lady Joya was also the mother of Lady Eilish, High Priestess of the Joy. Eilish is the daughter of Joya and Pan, himself." Although she is no longer his only child....

"The Temple teaches and observes all sects of Pan, although there is some favoritism towards the Joy, mostly due to Eilish's presence here at the Temple. I myself tend to favor the Joy and Art, but am hardly the warrior type to follow Pan's Blood. We try to maintain some balance and offer altars to each of the sects, which is our Temple is cross-shaped. It allows each corridor to lead to an altar. This allows them to be sperate enough to keep from interfering with each other, yet still connected for those that follow more than one path."

Vanir leaned a bit closer on his arm, still keeping a fair distance from the beauty, and asked softly. "Does any sect interest you more than the others?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

"I think it would make the most sense if I fell along the lines of Pan's Art." She murmured softly. "I am familiar with expressing one's self through the fine arts, singing, dancing and acting. I also believe it brings healing to the ones that have never experienced happiness. The pure act of mimicking real emotional situations bring excitement to me by studying my audience's reaction with tears, laughter and their applause." She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment as if concentrating on something unseen.

When she opened her eyes, they were gazing into Vanir's blue eyes as she continued to speak. "Please tell me of your loss, priest. I felt, no, I feel your sorrow. Perhaps you are not here for me, but I was sent here to help you through your grief." Her fingertips gently grazed his cheek. "It is as clear as day that you need to mend, Vanir before you can continue to teach me."

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir felt a strong connection to the singer's desire to express herself through song. It was what first drew him to Pan. The thought of playing his music for people all across the lands, letting them listen to a part of his soul in each song. It was her sudden physical contact that brought him back to reality, such as it was.

The priest stared into the deep, grey eyes of Alazandra, unsure of what to say. A soft voice responded slowly, gathering his words as they flowed out. "There has been much sadness in the Citadel of late, costing the lives of many of my friends and several priests here at the Temple. My own love and soul mate was, also, taken in the darkness that swept our city." He paused and breathed deeply. "It has been some time since I lost her." The adhiel looked deep into her eyes once. "You are the first to touch me since I lost her, something quite uncommon for a priest of Pan."

Vanir smiled softly at the achadhiel beauty and spoke in brighter voice. "I appreciate your gesture, but I am not the only one grieving. You feel my sadness, because I opened it up to you, but I also feel yours. It is not just your thoughts or feelings, but that look in your eyes right now. Perhaps we can help each other?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

Shrewd smokey grey eyes never left his face as she studied Vanir. His emotions making him so real she was not entirely sure this was a dream. "I am sorry to hear of your loss. It is difficult to lose someone that you considered your soul mate." She whispered softly, but her words still crystal clear. When the priest's eyes met hers, she gave him a small smile. "Perhaps you are still grieving and even cautious to taking another to love because you are not ready to let go of your first?" Then her fingertips brushed across Vanir's lips.

When he seemed to realise that he was supposed to be her counselor, she pulled away slightly and hugged herself once again. "I..." Alexandya sighed softly. "My mother was murdered...as far as I know. My life was supposedly in danger so I have been running since I heard the news. No one knows me or where I am or who I am and I wish it to remain so. My mother's killer is faceless and I do not honestly know what she did and if she deserved her untimely death. I do not know if my father is still alive or if it is even safe to look for him." Again she studied Vanir to catch anything that might be a key into his thoughts.

She hesitated once more before continuing, "I would not know how you could help me. I feel very much alone in this world even when I do have friends and people I believe I can trust enough to...love."

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir sighed softly as she ran her fingers over his lips, kissing them briefly. The heart of the panling had been hurt deeply by Perdita's death and the young woman in front of him was helping ease his pain. It was easy to open up to her as she had felt such loss as he had. He listened with great compassion as she told her own story. Alazandra had opened her heart to the priest, but still seemed so alone.

Vanir moved over next to her on the pillows and placed an arm over her shoulder. He held her tight against, hugging the sad girl affectionately. He whispered softly into her ear. "It is never easy to heal from your pain. I do not know if I could help you or not, but I would like to try. Open yourself up to me and I shall open myself up to you. Maybe through our pain, we can find a way to feel happiness again." The handsome adhiel reached over with his other hand and brushed away a few strands of hair from the singer's face, smiling down at her.

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

The kiss against her fingertips left her warm and her hand began to tingle where Vanir's lips touched. When he drew closer, Alexandrya did not pull away and returned his hug, afraid that at this moment she would break if she let down her guard. The priest of Pan would be able to feel her shudder as she fought with herself at lowering her defenses. She could not breathe and soft gasps lead to tears. "I-I cannot...I cannot let go of these feelings or she will disappear and her killer will go free."

Hot tears began to roll down her cheeks as she started to burn with fever, her breath becoming shallower as she felt as if she was being choked. She held onto him as her body shook as she even pushed back what emotions she still tried to keep at bay. "I-I am sorry. This..." She pulled away from the adhiel. "I--" More tears came down as she curled up in a ball in front of Vanir as if her presence here made Alexandrya lose her ability to control herself and keep her guard up which scared her more than anything at the moment.

[Vanir Alfheim]

Alazandra had bared herself to Vanir and showed him something that she kelpt secret for most others. It was not lost on him and knew that she had shown him a deep part of herself. Tears slowly rolled down his cheek as the beautiful achadhiel curled up in front of him. He had a deep connection with her, understanding her pain better than most could.

Vanir leaned down and placed a hand on her face, wiping away her tears and stroking her cheek. A gentle, caring voice tried to calm her fears. "You do not have to forget your mother or forgive those guilty of such a horrible act, you only have to forgive yourself. Open your heart up and try to live your life to its fullest. You are a beautiful, strong woman, Alazandra." The priest turned her face up towards his and stared down at her with his deep, blue eyes. "You deserve to be happy and I want to help you learn to love again."

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

When his fingertips wiped away her tears, she watched his lips move, heard his soft voice and felt him trying to calm her. "I cannot be truly happy until...until justice is served. I will not be able to rest until the ones that killed my mother...until she is avenged." She tried not to sound bitter, angry and selfish that she was left in this world alone that her mother did not have the opportunity to teach her all that she knew that Alexandrya was still left weak and vulnerable to fend for herself.

That stabbing pain returned as she held her hand against her heart. "I-it hurts so much." She gasps softly. "It feels like it will never go away, never release me. I cannot forgive myself if I know what I have to do next..." His compliments helped calm her somewhat, but she was still holding back and he knew it. It was a secret she could not speak of even if this was a dream. It was a matter of life or death and she knew she had much to learn before she could bring her plan to fruition even if it meant losing her soul.

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir could feel a darkness inside of Alazandra, much like his own. The feeling of guilt and helplessness that he had felt at the hands of Silk, only it wasn't his mother that was killed, but the students under his charge. The burning need for vengeance and justice that could only be soothed by the blood of another. It was a bitter taste all to familiar on the lips of the priest.

Vanir stared down into the stormy eyes of the young woman and opened himself up to her again, slowly so he would not overwhelm. He allowed his own feelings to trace along her skin as if it were his own touch, letting her see his pain if she chose to. The strong, low voice of the adhiel whispered to his companion. "It will control you, if you do not control it. A desire this strong must be replaced by a stronger desire, before it consumes you. You need to do as we have all learned to do.......you must wait. Retribution can be a long wait, hiding in the back of your mind, until you have the chance to act." The priest leaned forward, his face only a few breaths away from hers. "Do you trust me, Alazandra?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

She knew his words were true. It would control her if she let it, but if Alexandrya opened up she feared that it could not be controlled. Vanir was so close to her that it was impossible to think. The room she was in, the adhiel she was with. It seemed to cloud her mind to slowly numb her against the pain even for a flicker.

Alexandrya wondered if that was really how this place felt or if it was because she was in the Aether. Again, her fingertips raised to the priest's handsome face gently grazing his cheek. "I-I do not know." The achadhiel softly murmured. "I could say yes, but would I really be able to? I would try in actions but...I still would believe it is in my nature to doubt." Do you exist? She asked herself as she continued to touch him to make sure he was there knowing it was silly but still fascinating to be in the Aether.

Was he created from a conjuration or have I fallen into someone's dream? Her thoughts flitting as she then wondered why she was really here. "I guess for this moment, I can say that you wish me no harm." She settled on these words and even managed a sweet smile.

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir laid there looking down at Alazandra as she stroked his cheek, his skin growing hotter under her touch. He placed his underneath her neck, his thumb stroking the smooth skin. The delicate voice of the singer offered to her explain her trust and her lack of trust in the same breath. It left more questions for the priest than answers with only her sweet smile as encouragement.

Vanir leaned forward slowly as if to kiss her, but never touched her lips. The air between them grew smaller as his deep blue eyes stared deeply into hers, unsure of what he was doing. A meek, soft voice escaped from the lips of the adhiel.

"Words...actions...they are only what you make them, trust is in your heart, where only you can see it. What is it that you want in this moment?"

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

The warm hand caused her eyes to close for a moment as Vanir stroked the sensitive spot. Alexandrya seemed to melt, her thoughts turning slightly into mush as he touched the nape of her neck.

As he drew nearer as if he was going to kiss her, her breath caught, her lips parted slightly. Her grey eyes caught in his deep blue gaze. She did not look away and in fact felt a certain peace. The achadhiel knew that everything the adhiel said was what she believed as well. So what was holding her back. Fear...

His next question caused her to hesitate as tears sprang into her eyes. No one has ever asked her that question before. Her mother never asked her when she kidnapped her from her father. Then she was left in the world to fend for herself when someone took her mother away. She knew nothing but what did she want in this moment?

"A hug." She said softly and a sweet little smile on her lips.

[Vanir Alfheim]

Vanir wiped away her tears with his thumb as he smiled down at her. He placed his other hand on the small of her back, pulling her up into his arms. He placed her head on his shoulder, holding her tight against his body. The soft music from before filled the air around them as if floating on the wind. A strong energy radiated from the priest, filled with happiness and love, tickling against Alazandra's skin. She had only to open her heart and it would flow through, cleansing her soul like a soothing bath. The act was instinctive by the adhiel, who had used the Aether to soothe others before.

Vanir whispered softly in her ear, delicate words flowing over his warm breath. "Thank you, Alazandra. You have been most helpful to me in these dark times, but let me help you as well. Open yourself to me and let the bright spots of our souls heal the dark ones."

[Alexandrya L`handriel]

The silver-haired achadhiel took the hug at its full effect, and opened herself to the soothing music. Again the heady feeling overcame her as a strong wine and she relaxed even more. When she heard Vanir's whispered words, her body tingled and she shivered as if fingertips had glided down her spine. A soft smile appeared upon her lips at his grateful words and her arms tightened around his.

She wanted this memory to be hers. Whether he was real or not, the feeling that she felt, the warmth, the happiness and love. Alexandrya wanted it to be filed away. "Perhaps we shall meet again, Vanir. I will do what I can to open myself up...but it will be slow." She did not want to release him from the hug and did so reluctantly as her smokey grey eyes gazed into Vanir's caring blue eyes. "I do not like my heart to constantly be dashed against jagged rocks of the Mer. Too many evil people out there waiting to prey on the trusting...be careful..."

Soft hands were placed on his shoulders and she leaned forward to place a kiss on his cheek.